Oh, the Horizon...

Two of the mommies who were in my graduating class of mommyhood -- that is, who all had their first babies around the same time -- are now pregnant with their second kids. I'm happy for them, in that crazy-lady ridiculous happy way I get happy these days when I find out someone I know is pregnant. I love it. One of my favorite people from high school just announced she is pregnant with her first. It's like a cult. Once you're in, you want everyone else in too.

But, I admit to a twinge of jealousy. There were things I thought I'd have done by now that still haven't materialized, and certain parts of my life still feel like I'm on hold. I've had the bug for a second baby myself for a while now. But, I also know that I'd be happier waiting for a while, so that I can have my wedding and honeymoon and then have another baby.

But the wedding is postponed indefinitely, until there is less debt and more money.

Which means that baby #2 is just somewhere out there on the distant horizon, as well.

I hate that someone else's good news makes me slip into a funk of depression. Like, what kind of horrible friend am I? Slash, horrible person, that I can't just be happy for their good fortune without a) slipping into a funk of depression, or b) making it all about me?

Summer Wardrobe

Since Mr. Shawn's birthday is on Monday, we've been going out this weekend to try to buy him some new jeans and things, since he's always complaining about all his clothes being old and worn, that his shirts have holes in them, and that he feels like a schmuck next to me. After reminding him that I like the way he dresses, I suggested getting some new clothes for his birthday this year.

It turns out, he's rather picky when it comes to clothes shopping. We left Macys, Nodstroms, Gap, JCPenny, Target, and Kohls empty-handed. Well, he left empty handed. I, on the other hand, left Target with a sackful of delicious new outfits for Miss Violet to wear this summer.

Now, I've been working on my bargain hunting habits. Just recently, I was able to get a brand new jogging stroller online (as it happens, through Target as well), that, to my good fortune, started out on sale, and after doing an internet search for "Target promo codes" was able to find a coupon code that took off an additional $5, PLUS free shipping. Shipping on the stroller was a whopping $23, so that's a nice big win. In the end, I got a stroller that is roughly $110 retail for just over $80. Sweet! (p.s., I highly recommend doing a search for coupons or promo codes + the name of whichever online retailer you're shopping before placing an order there. I found a great website, RetailMeNot, that seems to have lots of great coupons and codes for a whole slew of big name stores, and you never know what kind of little known or secret promotions a store is running. You may not find anything, but it never hurts to check!)

Which is why, when I walked past the kids clothes section at Target and saw that all these delightful little pieces were all less than $10 each, I was in hipster heaven.

First of all, you don't get much cuter than kids in rompers. And these ones are just so off the charts adorable with their sunny summer colors and little girlie decals, it was too much to resist. The flowered dress is also a charmer. As much as a part of me hates to be matchy-matchy, I also can't stop buying purple clothes for Violet. Soon she'll be dressing herself and probably taking after her father and wearing black and whatnot, so I'm taking advantage of all the girlie stuff I can until then.

I've been waiting for her to be old enough to wear a tutu since before she was born. And this one was $5. That's Five. Dollars. There was also a smashing lime green option, but, again, with the purple thing. It looks more pink in the picture, sadly. The matching top was also a steal at $5. The rompers were $8 a piece. I mean really, I only wish they made them in my size for that price. 

We're still working on what to get Shawn, it's entirely possible that he will end up with a video game instead, and the same old jeans he's been wearing for 12 years. Do boys have it easier or harder than us? Sometimes I can't tell.  

Beautiful, Hateful Money

In the last ten years, I can’t remember ever feeling really secure about my finances. First, there were the college years, during which I was working a work study job for something like $500 a month, and I embodied the starving student to a T. Then I was out of school and working as a receptionist, paying my own bills for the first time and trying to figure out how to budget. And, seemingly just as I got to a place where I was making a decent salary and staying on top of bills with money leftover for fun, I shack up and get knocked up all within the same year, and I’m now juggling family finances on what should really only support a single gal.

As recently as two years ago, the whole being broke thing didn’t bother me as much. It’s almost glamorous, in your early and mid-twenties, to be living on the edge of one’s paycheck, finding creative ways to eat and entertain oneself, commiserating with other about who’s got less money. It's the whole single person lifestyle, you're having fun and being reckless and hooray!

But with a baby and a fiancé, now being broke just kind of sucks.

My priorities have changed. I’m not looking to live in cheap apartments for the rest of my life, or even the near future. I want a nice home for me and my family, a car that was manufactured in this century, the ability to take family trips and money in the bank in case of emergencies. I want to put money away for the baby’s education, and lay a financial foundation for her future.

Oh, and a wedding. Did I mention wanting to have a wedding at some point in, oh, the next year?

And on top of that, I’m just getting sick and tired of feeling like crap because I have no money. I’d like, for once, to read a magazine and not have to fantasize about buying a $25 tube of lipstick. I would like to feel as though it’s not a complete pipe dream to buy a new Coach bag, provided I’ve salivated over it for long enough to make the purchase justifiable. I’d like to bargain hunt because I want to, not because I have to.

I’d like to feel like a grown-up who can afford nice things, basically.

Step one is to get myself back to square one. I’ve started using Mint.com, a very nifty budgeting website, to help me keep my spending in check and put money towards the things that need to be paid down. I’ve canceled my gym membership in favor of the beach trail outside my house and the many dvds I own. I’m looking at cutting a lot of things, actually, memberships I don’t use or items I don’t really need to buy.

I’ve never been super great at sticking to a budget. I’m hoping that Mint, with all its lovely graphics and alerts and colorful tools, will crack the digital whip and keep me honest. 

What tricks do you mamas use to manage your family finances? I will gladly and shamelessly steal all your ideas!